Jeans are funny kinds of things. Back when I was about 7 till I was about 11 I never wore jeans. ever. I went through a "white phase" where I wore all white. A typical outfit would be white Keds, white socks, white stretch pants, a white turtle neck, and a white headband. It cracks me up. I hated jeans. Despised them. Swore I would never wear them. When I was 12, I had a slight identity crisis and never dressed up. Ok, I dressed up once, but it was stirrup stretch pants with cool (at least I thougth they were cool at the time) platform-ish shoes, an old navy sweater with a striped turtle neck underneath. Hah. Every other day I wore sweatpants and sweatshirts with turtlenecks and a scrunchie in my hair. And keds.

In 7th grade, I graduated to nike shoes and "flare" jeans. It was crazy. It just so happened that 7th grade was my extreme growing year, and the cute jeans soon became high waters. Me not being the fashion savvy chick I am today, I never noticed. Great. In 8th Grade I discovered looser jeans. There's not so much to talk about there. 8th grade was weird for me a little bit. Kinda fuzzy. Right, back to business.

I first fell in love with a pair of jeans in 9th grade. Kate passed them down to me. I still think of them fondly. They fit me so well, and I felt so nice when I wore them. Then, tragedy struck- in the form of a humongus hole right below the left-back pocket. I had to retire them. The rip was too high up to make them into shorts, and they were becoming a tad small.

The next pair of jeans I fell in love with was in 10th grade. They were Kate's also. I'm wearing them right now. There are some small holes, that I have just discovered are getting bigger. The only problem with that is that the holes I wear into my jeans are never in cool places, like the knees. They are in places like the butt and on the belt loops and akward places like that. The holes are getting bigger, and it is time for me to move on. Don't get me wrong, I wear other jeans, these just make me feel the best.

I'm excited about this next pair of jeans I'm going to adopt. Yet again, they are from Kate. They are really long and fit really nicely and make my legs look long and skinny. The only problem is that they have stains on the knees. Stain stains. Stains from stain. Kate stained a deck in them at Bear Trap. Anyway, I've worn them, and I like them a lot. A lot a lot. I'm looking forward to the time I will spend with them.

I never knew I could write so much about jeans. Whaddya know. Fun times.

High school is weird. A lot of people are fake and superficial. It's weird being surrounded by people who are ok with just skating by as long as they are cool. I wish it wasn't like that. I like having intelligent conversations sometimes. I like having conversations if they mean something, not just for the sake of having a conversation. Otherwise, it's pointless. Just words filling up space. I want it to be spring. I have been overwhelmed with winter, and I think I can return to my normal self when I can spend some time outside. Commune with nature. Get back in touch with my romantic self. I'm tired of being tired. I'm tired of people talking about other people. It really doesn't help anything but the instigation of more talking. I can't wait until summer when I don't have to face the fakeness all day. I'm tired of akwardness. I'm tired of being tired. All I really want to do is sit on a hammock in the spring air and think about things until I fall asleep. If only. I like sitting and doing nothing except listen to good music. I like reading good books. I like being sincere and real. I like talking to the imaginary person reading this blog. I like looking at the stars. I like reading good books. I like silence sometimes. I like sleeping without having to wake up to an alarm. I like using my brain. I like talking about what I like. It makes me happy. Thanks for listening.

The warm front is gone. It's becoming more like February now. I don't like it. On to toher things, I have to play for the Orchestra for Cinderella today. My lips are totally shot and I sound like crap... hopefully this will go away sooner rather than later. I'll just try to play as softly as is humanly possible on the oboe, and hope for the best. I only have to last from 6:30-7:15. Wish me luck. Ok, nothink left to talk about... adios.

Babysitting sucked last night. They were supposed to get home at 11:00 and they got back at 1:45. And the kid stayed up the whole entire time. I, however, fell asleep for about 2 whole hours. Holy cow. I got 60 bucks, though, so it wasn't totally worthless. Oh, and I'm allergic to their cats...

So I didn't post for the past couple of days. The end of this week has been really kinda weird: Thursday felt like Friday, Friday felt like Thursday, and Saturday felt like crap. Saturday school is unfortunately becoming some kind of routine. I'll be pleasantly surprised to have two whole days off of school. One thing that has made it slightly bearable is the warm front that has seemed to move through. I actually wore a short sleeve shirt and went walking! The short sleeve shirt might have been a little over the top. I couldn't resist. I won't, however, wear shorts until there is no chance of cold weather. And until it isn't February. This weekend is also weird because my family isn't here. They are all in Raleigh at a swim meet. I'm home alone. I've been watching TV for a long time, probably because there has been nobody to stop me. I have to babysit at six tonight. Great fun. This is a night of firsts in the babysitting department. First A) the kid actually asked for me to babysit her... whoa... and first B) I might actually feel like doing something other than watch TV. I'm gonna get a lot of money, too. Babysitting is the best job ever.

P.S.- people that pee in bottles in class and then cuss at the vice principal about it and then try to get out of their 3 days of OSS crack me up. It would have been worth fighting for, and they probably would have won, if they hadn't have cussed at the v.p. So Mrs. Mendez isn't the nicest person in the world, and you really had to pee. All that needed to be done was some simple negotiating, and explaining the situation. Silly boys.

So basically that Asset Test was ridiculous. It started of with a writing test. Whoa. That was the easiest dang thing that I have ever taken. It would underline this ridiculously stupid part of the sentence that was way wrong and then give a "no change" choice, two other ridiculous choices, and the obviously right answer. I wish I could think of an example for you. I guess you just had to be there. Then the reading comprehension was basically just about details from the reading that you had to go back and look for. I haven't done that since about 7th grade. Then there was "numerical skills" where we couldn't use our calculators. I was way rusty on multiplying and dividing decimals, but the way I see it, I'll always have my trusty TI-83. It's weird how simple math can be so hard after doing semi-advanced math for so long. And then there was the calculator part that was Algebra 1 all over again. Including the sleeping. So it wasn't that fun, but I got out of a reading check in 1st period and I got a little nap in between sections. Hopefully I will place out of the "0" level courses at Surry. Boy, I sure hope so.

nope. still not gone. and I have to take an asset test tomorrow. great.

Whoa. I just lost my post. Weird. It didn't say anything important, though. Just that I have writer's block. Still do. Hopefully it will be gone by tomorrow. Guess that's all.

Yay for our Quiz Bowl Team!!! We won, for the 3rd year in a row. It was a fun day. After taking about 7 questions of a reading check in English, we got to go on a bus (that smelled like football players) to the AGP. The questions were really great. There was even one about blogs!!! 'what is the term for an online journal?' Sarah, Brad, and I totally had that one covered. During the refreshment break, Sarah and I talked to a guy she knew from Governer's school and some of his friends, one of whom recognized me from band. It was fun times. I got to be on the panel for the middle round, missing my hecka easy individual question on alternating current. It was swimming around in my brain, but it just didn't come together in 10 seconds. Then we got the best set of questions ever for the final round. They (Brad, Johnathan, Sarah, and Holden) collectively knew most of the answers. It was great fun. After the competition and the tons of pictures, we were waiting for the bus where we had a great conversation on the difference between geeks and nerds. I think we concluded that geeks know the difference between geeks and nerds, and nerds didn't. Oh the conversations of a Quiz Bowl team. So now we will advance to the District Competition, to be held also at the AGP on March 20th. I'm excited. Anyway, so now I'm gonna babysit. On Valentines Day. How romantic. Hasta luego.

In the words of Sarah Gitt, SAD (single awareness day) is coming up this Saturday, and we have to go to school. I wish we got out of school every time it rained. I, however, will not be at school because of the Quiz Bowl "meet." This year seems to be a good one, and I hope we will be victorious yet again. I'll be there supporting from the audience, as usual, getting some random questions right. Fun times await me. This weekend is going to be quite jam-packed for me, and I'm looking forward to it. Except for the makeup work that I'll have to do for missing Saturday. That won't be fun. Right-o, now I must go read The Scarlet Letter... great fun...

Never get your kitchen remodeled and/or your cabinets stained. If you do, be sure to invest in some serious gas masks and air fresheners. Whoa. I have the worst headache right now. Ahh. Just wanted to share that with you guys.

Happy Valentines Week. and always remember...
"Love lifts us up where we belong"

Prom is a curse on everybody without boyfriends. I hate it. I actually hate talking about it. It gives me a headache. All of my friends act like it's the easiest thing in the world to have a date. That is probably because it probably is the easiest thing in the world for them to do. It might not be hard for everyone to do, but not everybody centers their lives around boys. Me, for example. I pay attention to more concrete things. Like: getting good grades; sleeping a lot; enjoying life; doing other things besides obsessing over the opposite sex. My life has been quite great without boys in main roles in my life. Don't get me wrong, I like boys plenty. I just don't make it my objective in life to be constantly with one. I need alone time, and spending time with friends is much more fun than the heartaches of high school dating. That's another thing. High school dating is RIDICULOUS and pointless. It is constant drama, and nothing good ever comes of it. I'm sure that the bad outweighs the good in that situation. I mean, I have a more enjoyable life than most people that move on to the next boyfriend within hours. It's silly. I like having intelligent conversations about events or ideas or books or something, while a lot of my friends enjoy having conversations about prom dresses and each other. I guess I'm just noticing that I am quite an individual. I don't really need a significant other to feel significant.

So there is a romance story for you. Sorry for my ranting. It needed to be done. I've heard that psychologists say that it is good to have an outlet for your thoughts and feelings. Welcome to my outlet for today. Adios.

Whoa there, I can't even make up a story. I'll need some help with this. How about you guys send me "topic sentences" and I write a story to go along with it. That would be peachy keen. We'll keep this up, so if you happen to think of a random one after Valentines day, I will still make up a story to go along with it. This sounds like fun. I'm looking forward to it, as should you. e-mail: refvemma@hotmail.com; aim: emmarefvem

Valentines Day is coming up. I would write about love stories or how much I'm looking forward to V-Day, but it just isn't happening. I mean, I don't have any personal love stories to tell you. None whatsoever. So I guess this is time to make up a love story. I will make it a continuing story, and you will have to stay tuned for the whole thing. Sounds like fun. I guess to make it legit, I should start another post. Consider it done.

So, our girls swim team won 1st place in 1a/2a states in the 200 Medley Relay this past weekend. I'm expecting rings, a picture and a plaque in the gym, and new bleachers... in Reeves. Oh, and a parade. But swim team doesn't get that much recognition. I swam in prelims and got 31st place in my 50 free and 27th place in my 100 breast. Yay! I'm really tired right now. Tired of life, tired of boys, tired of girls, tired of driving, tired of school, and tired of being tired. I'm going to go do homework now... to add to my good mood.

p.s.- i like movies based on previous works of literature. that's what we watched on the way to and from and around raleigh. these included 10 things I hate about you (taming of the shrew), o brother where art thou (the odyssey), and clueless (emma).

I am exhausted from school today. My brain is killing me. I just want to go to sleep for a couple of days. On another note, I tricked myself into thinking it was summer today. I was sitting in AP Stats reading the Scarlet Letter when it happened. I get lost in books, and forget where I am. It was hot in the room, so I opened the window and took off my sweatshirt, to leave only the short sleeve shirt underneath. It felt like spring, and I heard a car outside and people talking and remembered spring. Then I looked back in the room and saw all the winter coats and winter dropped it's heavy load on my back once again. I don't like winter. It lasts too long. It is dreadful. I can't wait until summer, or spring at the least. I can't wait to wear birkenstocks without socks and cool t-shirts. Man, I miss those days. Alas, the groundhog says we'll have more winter. Darn him. I guess I'll just have to survive wintry mixes and freezing rains for a few more months. Tengo dolor de cabeza. (holla back spanish 2) I'm gonna go sleep or something. Tootles!

The super bowl isn't such a big deal. I don't like football and that halftime show was not very exciting. There were some good commercials, but that was it. I ate way too much food at Erin's. There was a lot of secret talking and people going to and fro at that party. I just sat there and watched the football that was kinda boring even to people that liked football. I don't like football probably because I don't understand it, and because I don't want to understand it. Whatever. Right now I'm trying not to think about going back to school tomorrow.

Happy February everyone! 2004 is a leap year, so get excited about February 29th! February is such a great month. It goes by so fast. And every once in a while you get an extra day. Woo hoo. Anyway. So today is Super Bowl Sunday. NC is getting really pumped up about our Carolina Panthers. Krispy Kreme is showing their support by making the sprinkles on the donuts black and blue. Gotta love the South. Ok so I just got writers block. I might blog later on. Chao!