oh boy. songs have such an emotional affect on me. like if i'm feeling a certain emotion and the exact right song comes on with the exact right chord progressions, my emotions at that point are meanifested in the song. sometimes i think i try to push back my emotions because maybe i don't want to feel them all the time, but those darn songs know exactly how to get them. i like it in a way, but sometimes i don't like it. i like listening to a cd and having the old feelings come back. like when i listen to my paul simon cd, i remember my general feelings from the first time i listened to it. i think that happens for all of my cds. the emotion that was the strongest while i listened to that particular cd in the past comes out the next time i listen to it. sometimes the words don't have anything to do with it. they could be happy words or something but they could make me feel really sad.

speaking of feeling really sad, i was remembering today the day that i had to say goodbye to Will at governor's school. oh, man was that sad. we went to lunch during my lunch break at the tavern restaurant in old salem (i think) but we were rushed for time. we had a good talk, but i had to leave early so i could go back to class. so i hugged him and said goodbye, knowing that i wouldn't see him for a really long while because he was moving to LA. he stayed to finish his lunch while i walked away and it was the most depressing thing ever. i walked by and waved to him sitting right by the window. it was a short walk back to class, but i couldn't help but cry. it was one of those cries where you don't want to cry because you're about to see people, people that you don't want to see you crying, so it makes you cry more. i think i should have skipped, but that would have caused a big hoo-ha and i didn't want that. it was the most depressing and sad thing ever. and plus, it was in like the 4th week of governor's school, so i was going through a homesick stage and all that crap, which didn't help.

speaking of governor's school and songs, i am listening to coldplay and the song that bridgit and kaila always played (God put a smile upon your face) just came on. oh, memories. i miss gsw. and i miss will. and i love music. the end.